Ben Ostler1/25/18English 102Writing project 1 proposal- Hopes for me My mother, Jo Bond-Ostler, has gone beyond the call ofduty in helping me and giving me advice in becoming a better person. I havegrown up with her fingerprints all over my personality and character.
ThisInterview shed more light into why it is so important for her to nurture andprotect her kid while letting him make his own choices. This interview was impactfulfor me because I’ve never heard many of these stories that she told me includingthe fact that she ran away from home before college. My mother used her positiveand negative experiences as a kid to be a better mother to me than her motherwas to her. As stated above, this interview was enjoyable and even surprisingbecause I never knew about her running from home.
I never met her parents andhave only met her two sisters twice. I was led to believe that the distanceapart was the main barrier. That was not the case, in the interview my mom explainsthat she and her parents disagreed on politics and it began to impact her whenshe began to look at colleges. My mom wanted to go to The University of Texasat Austin, but her parents claimed that the school was too ‘liberal’. She endedup not listening to her parents and went to the University of Texas. Excellingand happy, she then got a call that her dad had passed away. Her dad was theone person in the house who listened to her opinions and let her make her ownchoices.
After feeling regret for not calling him in the final weeks, my momdecided to honor the hard-working mentality of her dad and study even harder.After becoming a scholar student, my mom was increasingly fearful of going hometo her mother. She then started to live and stay at her friend’s house withouther mother’s consent. Graduated from college and then moved to a Chicago to getmarried and start a family. My mom has overcome having nobody in her corner to backher up and she has still gotten up and had a positive outlook on life. Duringthe interview I noticed that she became emotional when talking about her mom becauseI believe she feels regret that they could never coexist. The main point that Itake away from this is how selfless my mom is towards me and her hopes for me. Introduction: ?Mymother, Jo Bond-Ostler, was born in New Mexico and moved to Texas when she wasabout 2 years old.
Grew up in a very conservative family and chose to grow uphow she felt. She went to a big high school and moved out away from her familyto become the only sibling in her family to obtain not only a college degree inAccounting, but a master’s in management.Questions:Wheredid you grow up? Veryyoung-Carlsbad, NM, but at 2 moved to Dallas, TX, then when I was about 10 Imoved to Lewisville, TX which is a small suburb of Dallas. Why didyour family settle in Texas? My dadwas an electrical engineer.
When in Carlsbad he worked for the Carlsbad Cavernsdesigning lighting layouts. A job working for the City of Dallas as aninspector of lighting and electrical configurations in the large skyscrapersbeing built in Dallas was offered to him. We all moved to Texas. Raisedin a small suburb of Dallas, what was the biggest challenge of attending a hugeschool like the University of Texas at Austin? When Iwas a sophomore in high school, I went to bank competition in Austin at theTexas campus. When I walked around the campus I knew I wanted to go there. Itwas big and sprawling and active. It was just alive. I did not realize what agood school it was, I just knew I wanted to go there.
Whatwas the toughest decision that you made that was against your parent’s advice? Goingto the University of Texas at Austin. My dad attended Texas Tech University andI think it was his heart’s desire to have me go there. But I fought to go toTexas and I did. One of the reasons why they did not want me to go to Texas isthat it was a very liberal school and they, my mom particularly, was worriedthat I would be converted to liberalism. What my mom did not know, but my daddid, that I was already on my way to be a liberal. He was proud of the factthat I had my own opinions and had justification for those opinions. Whatwas your relationship with your mom like? My momfelt that her opinion was the only correct opinion. If I voiced a difference ofopinion, she would often completely dismiss my statements.
This relationshipcontinued from when I was very young until she passed away. We could not carryon a conversation without there being hurt feelings. It was often the case thatwe did not speak so everyone else could be happy. It taught me to have respectfor other opinions because she did not care to hear my opinion. Whatwas your relationship with your dad like? My dadwas the most amazing person.
He would ask what I was doing and really listen tomy answer. He loved to read and passed that along to me. He loved to discusspolitics and passed that along to me. He was very smart and encouraged me inevery way. He was a very strict disciplinarian, and this did not go over wellwith my sisters.
But he was the youngest of six kids growing up in the GreatDepression in Oklahoma, so his family was very poor. The first time he had anarticle of clothing that was not a hand me down was when he joined the Navy aspart of World War II. I was the youngest and so he made sure to give me muchmore attention. So, my relationship is very different from what my sistersremember.
There is a bond between youngest. How didyour life change after the loss of your dad? I was at college when my dad passed away and Ifelt so far from him. I had not spoken to him in a couple of weeks, so it mademe sad that I had not called him. But he passed away suddenly and did notsuffer.
It was a terrible thing to me because he had taught me so much and Idid not thank him. But he is still with me because of the things he taught me,the desire to learn, being a baseball fan, looking at the world as being aglass half full, and trying my best at all things. That is a nice legacy forhim. I ended up leaving the house prematurely after the constant arguments. Istayed at a friend’s house and went home only to wash clothes and visit my siblingsevery couple of weeks.
In a weird way, I bonded with my sisters and gained confidenceto carry his traditions. How has that situationhelp you become a better parent?Its given me both endsof the parenting spectrum. I always let you share your own opinions and let youmake your own decisions, but ill always give you my best advice.
I also have triedmy best to give you the safest house possible where you won’t have to make adecision like I had to do. Whatbrought you to Chicago? I wanted to get out of Texas which was allabout the good old boys. I visited Chicago and really liked the city.
Why notanother city in the Midwest? When Iwas looking to move, I knew I wanted to move to a big city. I visited New Yorkand really liked it but did not see myself as living there. On garbagecollection day, I do not think anyone wants to live in NY. I visited Boston,liked it, but did not think it was the place for me because the people thoughtthey lived in the only city that was any good. Also, I was a Yankees fan, Iwould not have survived Boston very long. Analysisand Reflection This project and interview idea was beneficial for bothsides. My mom and I hadn’t talked since I had gotten back to school and my momhad never told em about her relationship with her mom.
I’ve always known thather and her mom had a strained relationship, but I never knew that she ran awaywhen her dad passed. I could tell the way she felt about each of her parentswhen she was talking on the phone by her tone and at the pace of speech. Whentalking about her dad she was soft at a slow pace and it seemed to be her reminiscingher time with him. Concurrently, when talking about her mom the tone was sharpand quick. The only question that was no answered in the interview was when Iasked my mom if she would change anything or say anything to tem is she sawthem today.
She seemed like she’s never thought about it or it could be that shedonsent like to think about that time in her life. In conclusion, I came out ofthe interview respecting that my mom was able to use her murky family past tohelp her become a better mother for me.